![]() Answering a hotline and working with residents taught me how women get stuck in cyclical patterns of abuse, and that literally anyone can fall into the trap of idealized thinking about what romance really is.Ī common piece of feedback I’ve gotten on my feminist reviews over the years is that, “it’s just a movie,” and this was no exception: In addition to the unusual volume of support and personal stories, there were those who disagreed with me. When I moved from New York City to a small town in 2015, I started volunteering at a domestic violence shelter. ![]() (One of my favorite Onion stories ever: “Woman Takes Short Half-Hour Break From Being Feminist to Enjoy TV Show.”) I’ve always been a proud feminist, but for years I found ways of pushing my views to the back burner when convenient. That’s a question fueling my interest in the confluence of movies and real life, a subject that’s grown thornier as we evolve as a culture and open up conversations we’ve previously avoided. ![]() I have some bad news about 'The Notebook' Gosling is currently linked to Eva Mendes, his costar in "The Place Beyond the Pines," and McAdams her "Midnight in Paris" costar, Michael Sheen. They even won the award for best kiss at the 2004 MTV Movie Awards. Ibrahim in San Diego wrote, “I wonder if the media we’ve all been consuming has led to women putting up with ‘bad’ guys because, in the movies, it all works out in the end.”įans of the "Notebook" really seemed to root for Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling. Some offered the grim revelation that their own lives had mirrored these romantic movie tropes – at their peril. ![]() They came from both women and men, with many telling me they were relieved to see someone saying out loud what they’d long believed. But I was unprepared for the passionate, personal nature of the messages readers sent (and nary a slur among them: Kudos, CNN.com readers!). Why was it OK to depict a woman being bullied or manipulated in the name of romantic obsession? Why are screaming fights so often shown as a precursor to everlasting love? And why have male characters been given so much leeway, over the decades, to behave terribly towards women and still emerge as romantic heroes?Īs a critic, I get lots of feedback, especially when writing about films with a high nostalgia factor. I couldn’t help cringing as I reevaluated what Hollywood has presented as idyllic true love. ![]()
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